The Heart Remembers
by Blue-EyedDisaster
Summary: What do you do if the only life you remember is the one you gave up? And now, it's the only thing that you want. That's what a very alive Jason Morgan has to figure out. How does he know that Elizabeth is the one he is truly meant to be with? Simple. Because she's the one his heart remembered.
1. Chapter 1

**A/N: Hey guys! So, this is my first GH story about the first couple that I ever rooted for that I've been meaning to put on here for a while. I used to watch this show all the time with my mom when I was a kid and I loved Jason/Elizabeth back then too. And I still try to keep up with it, or at least keep up with Liz's sl. I hated when they killed Jason off. But in my story, he's not really dead. :) Anyway, I didn't change any history (even though I really wanted to) because I wanted to show a cool possibility of what could happen if Jason were to be found alive and a way for him and Elizabeth to get back together. So, yeah...hope you like!**

* * *

The day had been a long one for Elizabeth Webber. It had started the same as the majority of her days. She woke up in a pretty good mood. Only to realize that she hadn't set her alarm the night before, and ended up two hours late for work. Then, in a rush to get to the hospital...she locked her keys in her car, and had to pay fifty dollars to get them out. When she finally arrived, the place was as busy as it had been in weeks. So, she didn't have a spare moment the entire day. She couldn't wait to go home and go to bed.

Then, when she got home, Cameron reminded her that he had a science project that was due tomorrow. So, she had spent the last two hours forming a model volcano. And on top of that, she was beginning to think Aiden had a cold. No, this was not Elizabeth's best day.

Finally, when she had gotten the boys to bed, she walked through the house flipping off lights. She was seriously contemplating sleeping on the couch, because she didn't know if she had the will to make it back upstairs. So, she was not in the stablest of states when she heard the doorbell ring that night.

Her first impulse was to ignore it. But against this impulse, she made her way to the door, hoping that whoever it was would be gone within thirty seconds.

She wasn't sure who she was expecting to see when she opened the door. But the figure that stood in front of her was most certainly not it. Great. Now, she was seeing things that weren't there. God, she really needed some sleep.

"Elizabeth", he said softly, his familiar blue eyes shining against the night sky.

Half-asleep at this point, she crossed her arms. "Please don't torment me right now. I know that you're not really here, Jason. I'm tired, and I really need some sleep."

There was a faint glow around him, and she knew that he was just a figment of her imagination. The product of her unrelenting day. She fought to keep her eyes open, but it was to no avail. She felt her legs give way, but she didn't feel an impact with the floor. In fact, she didn't remember anything after that. Just that she finally got to go to sleep.

* * *

Jason sat in the chair across from her bed, watching her sleep. He was so relieved to be back with the woman he loved. How hard he had fought to get back to her and the boys! He wasn't entirely certain of how long he had been gone, but it was far too long. Elizabeth looked a bit different than he remembered. A new hairstyle...that was probably what it was. And upon examining his reflection in a mirror, he could see that he looked slightly different as well.

His eyes caught hold of a calendar that was hanging on the wall on the other side of the room. Reluctantly, he stood up, and made his way to it. But what he read caused his eyes to widen in shock. November 2013.

2013? How could it be 2013? No wonder he and Elizabeth both looked different! God only knows how much Cam and Jake had grown. And he hadn't even seen them yet. He started to leave Elizabeth's room in search of the boys when he heard her begin to stir. He sat down on the bed next to her, and smiled softly as her eyes fluttered open.

Elizabeth's eyes opened, and she was greeted with the face of the love of her life. Initially, she smiled. She must still be dreaming. Which was really strange because she felt very awake.

She reached her hand up to brush his cheek. "Jason, you can't be here. I got to get up, or I'll have another awful day like yesterday."

"I don't think yesterday was so awful", he remarked. "It was the day I finally got home. To you and the boys."

Her eyebrows furrowed in confusion, and she slowly sat up. "No. You're a dream. Jason, you've been dead for over a year now. You're not real. You can't be real."

"I am real", he assured her, cupping her face in his hands. "And I'm never gonna leave you again."

She shook her head, still disbelieving of what was going on. She had dreamed of Jason many times since his death. But she couldn't deny that this felt different somehow. It felt much more real than all the other times. And that scared her to death.

Jason was a bit puzzled, however, by her words. If he had been "dead" a year, then why could he not remember all of the other years? He decided that particular question could wait. First, he had to get Elizabeth to see that he wasn't a figment of her imagination.

Elizabeth threw the covers off of her, and hopped out of the bed. She pointed at him. "You. Aren't. Real. I'm not sure if you're a dream or a hallucination right now. Or maybe you're a ghost. That's probably what you are. And besides, if you were real, you wouldn't even be here right now. You would be with your wife."

His expression reflected his confusion. "Okay, I'm not really sure what's going on here. But if you're not my wife, I don't have one."

"Yes you do. Sam", she uttered. She couldn't remember the last time she had ever been so frustrated with someone who wasn't even really there. God, what if she was losing her mind?

"Sam?", he repeated in amusement. "Like Sam McCall? I think you're more confused than I am. I would never marry her."

"Well, you did", Elizabeth countered. "And you two have a son. God, if I weren't so sure that you weren't real, I would take you to the hospital to have you checked out."

"Elizabeth, this is ridiculous!", Jason exclaimed. "I know I had a thing with Sam once, but there is no way that I would marry her. And she can't even have kids! Where are you coming up with this?"

"Oh my God! Just go away!", she yelled. "Why don't you go haunt Sam? I have two kids that I have to get to school, and a job that I have to get to!"

"Mommy?"

She turned to see her youngest son standing in the doorway. She sighed, and held her arms out to him. "Come here, baby."

The little boy ran into her arms, and Jason stood there as confused as ever.

"What's your name?", the little boy asked innocently, staring up at him with a pair of eyes that were identical to Elizabeth's.

Elizabeth's own eyes widened in shock. Her gaze switched back and forth between the two of them. "You see him too?", she asked her son in a shaky tone.

Aiden nodded, and pointed at Jason. "Right there."

So, Jason wasn't a figment of her imagination. Or a hallucination. Or part of a dream. Or a ghost. He was...real. She felt like she was going to faint. Jason was here. He was alive.

She slowly set her son back down. "Okay, sweetie. Can you go ask Cam if he'll make you some cereal?"

After Aiden had toddled out of the room, Elizabeth looked back at Jason. Tears began to flood her eyes, and she threw her arms around him. He held her tightly as she cried.

She eventually pulled back. "You're alive. I don't understand. How can you be alive?"

"I uh...I'm not really sure", he replied honestly, trying to make sense of everything that was happening. "That kid is your son?"

"Yeah. Aiden. Oh my God, Jason. You really don't remember anything, do you?"

"I remember you. I remember us. And Cam and Jake. Can I see them? They've probably got so big", Jason said, forcing a hint of a smile.

Elizabeth tried with everything in her power not to cry. But even still, she could feel tears threatening to fall. "Jason...I need to get you to the hospital", she said gently. "They'll help you get your memory back, okay?"

"Okay", he agreed reluctantly, allowing her to take care of him. She was the only person he really trusted. Especially since he wasn't even sure who he was anymore. There were a lot of things that she didn't fill in. He ached to know them, and yet, he wasn't sure if he wanted to know them.

* * *

"Oh my God", Patrick Drake uttered in disbelief, as Elizabeth brought a very much alive Jason Morgan into the hospital. "Jason?"

Elizabeth nodded. "He's alive, Patrick. I don't know how. And he's really confused. I don't think he remembers a whole lot from the past few years."

Patrick just stood there with a stunned expression for a minute before finally snapping out of it. "Okay. Come with me."

Jason looked at her helplessly. He just got home. The last thing that he wanted was to be poked and prodded like some kind of science experiment.

"Go with Patrick. I'll be right here waiting for you, okay?", she assured him.

Reluctantly, he walked away with the doctor. She collapsed into the nearest chair, disbelieving of that morning's events. Jason was alive. And she couldn't be happier about that. But his memory was obviously all kinds of screwed up. He had thought they were together. He didn't remember what happened to Jake. He didn't remember marrying Sam. Sam. She should probably call her. But somehow, she didn't think that would be the best idea.

Or who knows? Maybe seeing Sam would make Jason remember everything. However, there was a part of her that wanted what Jason remembered to be true. The life that he wanted was the life that she had wanted for the longest time. More than anything. But it wasn't his life. And she wasn't his wife. She had to do the right thing.

Slowly, she pulled out her cell phone and dialed Sam's number. It rang for a couple of times, and then went to voicemail. She hung it up. What was she going to say? "Hey, Sam. Just wanted to call you and tell you that your husband is still alive. But he doesn't actually remember marrying you."

Truthfully, Elizabeth liked the fact that _she_ was the one Jason remembered. But that didn't matter. All that mattered was that he was alive. And soon, he would remember everything. He would go back to his wife and son like nothing had ever happened.

After what seemed like an eternity, Jason approached her with Patrick by his side. She stood up immediately. "Hey. Did you figure out what was wrong? Why he can't remember anything?"

Patrick shook his head sympathetically. "No. There is no head trauma or anything that would lead to memory loss. Jason is actually really healthy for someone who's supposed to be dead."

She sighed. "Well, thank you for looking at him. And Patrick, would you mind keeping this to yourself for a little while? I'm not sure the whole town needs to know about Jason just yet."

He nodded in an understanding manner. "My lips are sealed."

"Thank you", she said sincerely. They watched the doctor walk away, and she turned back to Jason. "We really need to get you home."

He wanted to go home too. He just had no idea which home she was referring to. He needed answers. He wanted to remember all of these missing pieces that Elizabeth wouldn't tell him. It was like she was waiting for him to remember on his own, but he just couldn't. Now more than ever, he needed her.

* * *

**Let me know what you think, please!**


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N: Wow, so first of all, thank you guys so much for all of your amazing reviews! I've never gotten that many for one chapter before, and I appreciate each one immensely. I'm so glad you guys are liking it so far! So, here's the next chapter!**

* * *

As they walked back into the house, Elizabeth let out a sigh. She had no idea what she was going to do. She couldn't keep harboring Jason here, keeping him a secret from the whole town. And he was steadily asking questions that she didn't know how to answer. How do you explain to someone what has happened over years of their life that they can't remember? It would take her days to recount all of that.

"Elizabeth?", Jason said softly.

She turned to face him. "What?"

"We aren't together anymore, are we?"

She shook her head in an almost sad manner. "No. I told you, Jason. You're married to Sam now."

She had mentioned that before, but he couldn't bring himself to believe that. He wasn't sure of many things, but he did know that he loved Elizabeth. Getting involved with Sam, however, was the worst mistake he ever made. He just had trouble accepting that he could have screwed his life up so badly. That he could've married a woman that he didn't love, and let the one that he did go.

He lowered himself down onto the couch, and clasped his hands together. "I don't understand how that can be true. It can't be."

Slowly, Elizabeth sat down beside him. "It is true. You...love her. You married her because you love her."

It hurt her immensely to utter those words. But they were true. Jason did love Sam. He put a wedding ring on her finger. He would've never done that if he didn't love her. Would he?

"I love _you_", he said quietly, tears glistening in his eyes. "What did I do to screw everything up, Elizabeth? What did I do to lose you?"

She sighed. "Jason, you didn't do anything. You just wanted to protect me and the boys. You didn't want us to get hurt. So...you walked away. But we both agreed that it was for the best."

He walked away? That was his family! That was the woman that he loved! How could he have done that? God, he hated himself.

"So, you mean to tell me that I walked away from you because I wanted to protect you...and then, I married Sam? That doesn't make any sense!", Jason lamented as he stood up, and began to pace the floor.

"Well, it's a little bit more complicated than that. There was a lot of time between those two events. And I guess you felt like Sam knew the risks of being with you, and she didn't have kids to protect at the time like I did so...", Elizabeth trailed off, noticing the very disturbed look on his face. "What's wrong?"

"Before...you said that me and Sam had a kid."

She slowly nodded. "His name's Danny."

Jason felt like he was the one who was about to faint. All of a sudden, he wasn't sure he wanted to know any more of his past. He didn't know if he could take learning about any more ill-advised things that he had done.

"Okay, I think I've had enough history lessons for today", he said, sitting back down on the couch beside her.

"You know you're going to have to go home eventually", she reminded him. "I can't just hide you here. If Cameron sees you, the jig's up. We'll be lucky if Aiden didn't tell anyone. But I don't think he recognized you, so maybe it'll be okay."

"What about Jake?", he wondered, mildly curious as to why she hadn't mentioned him with her other two children.

Her heart was breaking for him. He was going to have to find out that his son was dead for the second time. She barely survived it once. And he was still reeling from all of the other stuff that he had just found out. She had real concerns of whether he would be able to handle the truth. But he had to be told sooner or later.

Elizabeth took a shaky breath. "Jason, there's something that you need to know."

The sudden noise of her phone ringing spared him the anguish for a moment. She debated whether or not she should pick it up.

"You gonna get that?", he asked. He could tell that something heavy was weighing on her, and he couldn't deny that it was making him nervous.

"Yeah", she reluctantly replied, picking it up. "Hello?"

_"Hey, Elizabeth?" _She could recognize the woman's voice as Sam's. Crap. What was she supposed to do now?

"It's Sam!", she whispered to Jason, whose face reflected his horror. "What am I supposed to do?"

"You can't tell her I'm here!", he whispered back. He had gotten himself into so much trouble. He didn't want anything to do with that woman, and here he was married to her. If she found out that he was alive, she would never leave him alone. He buried his head in his hands.

_"Elizabeth?"_

"Yeah, I'm here", she responded, clutching her phone to her ear.

_"Uh, yeah. Did you call me earlier?"_

"Yeah. Um...I just wanted to check on Danny. He's still doing good, right?"

_"Oh. Yeah, he's doing fine."_

"Okay, that's good to hear", she remarked. "Well, I hate to sound rude, but I really need to go. I have company right now."

_"Uh, okay. Bye."_

She hung up the phone, and ran her fingers through her hair. "This is such a mess."

"You just randomly call to check up on people's kids?", Jason asked, unsure if that explanation was going to fly with Sam. She wasn't stupid.

"That's all I could think of", Elizabeth said defensively. "And it wasn't all too long ago that he was sick, so I don't think it's that out-of-the-ordinary."

"What do you mean he was sick?"

She sighed. "He had leukemia."

"Oh my God."

"He's fine now", she assured him, holding onto his hand. He couldn't take any more right now, and she knew it. "I think maybe you should go lie down. I know this is all a lot to process."

Normally, he would've brushed the suggestion off. But he knew that she was right. So, he headed up to the guest room, and fell fast asleep.

* * *

He awoke a few hours later to a clanging noise, and his eyes immediately opened to see Elizabeth setting a tray of food on the nightstand.

"Sorry", she apologized.

"It's fine. What time is it?", he wondered, noticing that the sky had turned dark outside the window. He sat up, and she sat down next to him.

"A little after six. I thought I'd bring you dinner since I'm kind of trying to keep the kids from seeing you until we figure out what you're going to do."

"Aiden already saw me", he pointed out.

"I know. But I'm hoping that he's forgotten all about that", she sighed. "I really don't think that this is a good idea, Jason. There are a lot of people that should know you're alive. Sam, Monica, Sonny, Carly, Michael, Spinelli...heck even A.J."

"A.J.?", he repeated in surprise. Surely she couldn't be referring to his dead brother. Then again, this was Port Charles. The town where no one stayed dead.

Elizabeth nodded, confirming his thoughts. "It turns out that he's alive after all."

And Jason thought that he was feeling better after his nap. He just let out a deep sigh. He wanted his memory back. He wanted to remember. Because it was getting harder and harder to absorb all of this information.

He thought he was coming home to the woman he loved, but he was beginning to realize that he was going to have to clean up messes that he didn't even remember making before he could have even a sliver of happiness.

"Can I see the boys?", he asked quietly, but in an almost desperate tone. He didn't just want to see them. He needed to see them.

"Jason, they can't see you. You really have to..."

"I'll wait until they're asleep", Jason offered, cutting her off. "They won't see me. I just want to see them. Please."

Elizabeth's glance was diverted to the floor. She couldn't look him in the eye. "Cameron will be in bed by nine. He's usually out in about fifteen minutes."

At her permission, he allowed himself to smile. "Thank you. What about Jake?"

She shook her head, unable to fight back her tears. They streamed down her cheeks, and she made no effort to stop them. Jason looked at her in concern, feeling a sense of dread build up inside him.

"Elizabeth? Where's Jake?", he asked again, terrified of the reason behind her tears. She was scaring him to death.

"I'm so sorry, Jason", she cried as he put his arm around her in an attempt to calm her down.

"Hey, what are you sorry about?", Jason asked gently. "Is Jake okay? Elizabeth?"

Elizabeth tried to collect herself. She had to be the strong one. He was going to need her to be, because even Jason wouldn't be able to be strong when she told him the truth. She wiped the tears from her eyes, and turned to him.

"There was an accident", she said quietly. "A car accident. It was dark. Jake was outside, and I didn't know...until it was too late."

As she trailed off, he began to realize what she was trying to say. He shook his head, as if that would somehow make her words untrue. He felt like he couldn't breathe. He couldn't speak. The gut-wrenching pain pierced through him with no mercy. It hurt worse than any knife or bullet. He knew what she was going to say before she even said it.

"Jake didn't make it", she whimpered.

And with that, Jason felt his whole world fall apart.

* * *

**So, I was crying at the end of this. Like I really really hate that they killed Jake off. And I just know I'm going to need some ice cream to get through this next chapter because it's going to be very sad. But anyway, I'd love to hear what you guys think.**


	3. Chapter 3

**A/N: Thank you guys so much for your amazing reviews! I know a lot of you are curious about what happened to Jason. Why did he lose his memory or were the last few years really his memory to begin with? Interesting...but on to this chapter now. **

**Warning: This chapter is extremely sad and depressing. It wouldn't hurt to have some tissue and a bowl of ice cream as you read.**

* * *

Jason Morgan cried himself to sleep that night.

When he woke up the next morning, he felt awful. His head was throbbing, and a quick look in the mirror revealed his puffy eyes. He was almost inclined to think that last night was some kind of cruel dream. Then, Elizabeth's words from the previous night came flooding back to him.

_A car accident. It was dark. Jake was outside, and I didn't know...until it was too late._

Once again, tears streamed down his face, and his head hurt even worse. He didn't care. What was there to care about anymore? His son was dead. Jake would never grow up. He would never have his first crush. Never ace or fail an algebra test. Never go to prom. Never graduate high school. Never go to college. Never get married or have children of his own. All of that was robbed from him.

But the most painful aspect of all for Jason was the realization that he would never get to hold his son in his arms again. He would never get to see him smile again. He had missed all of the significant moments in his son's short life. Something that he just couldn't imagine himself doing. But he had. And his heart ached as it hit him. Jake probably died never knowing who he was.

Jason wouldn't have just walked away. He knew in his heart that he wouldn't. And yet, the person that he trusted most in the world had said otherwise. There had been no bitterness or resentment in Elizabeth's voice when she had informed him of this. Of course not. She just wasn't that kind of person. But he hated himself enough for the both of them. He walked away from her, from the family that they were supposed to have together.

Now, he had nothing. He didn't know what he expected life to be like when he finally got home. But he thought he would still have Elizabeth. He thought he would still have Jake. And as it turned out, he had neither. All he wanted was to be able to hold his son in his arms one more time, and tell him how much he loved him. He would never have that chance now. And it was his own fault.

* * *

"How did it happen?"

Elizabeth stood up from her position on the couch to see Jason standing behind her. His voice was still filled with so much pain and confusion. She was sure it would be for a long time. It was so unfair that he had to go through this twice. And now, she would have to explain everything that happened that night. He deserved to know. Even if he blamed her this time.

She slowly approached him, sympathy written all over her face. "Do you want to know just how it happened or all the circumstances leading up to it too?", she asked in a near-whisper, not even attempting to sidetrack the question.

"I want to know everything", he said quietly.

She nodded, and led him to the couch. Once they were seated, she began to speak. "I did a lot of things that I'm not proud of. And once you know, you might not look at me the same."

Jason didn't respond, so Elizabeth took a deep breath and continued. "I got back together with Lucky. But I think, subconsciously, I knew I didn't want to be with him. And I ended up doing something really awful. Something so awful that I knew, deep down, he would never really forgive me for. I had an affair with Nikolas."

His eyes widened, displaying his shock. He didn't want to hear about her being with any other man, but Nikolas? Lucky's brother? God, she must have been really desperate to get away from Lucky. But what did any of that have to do with Jake?

"I got pregnant", she continued.

"With Aiden, right?" She nodded, and Jason felt like he needed to lie down again. "So, Nikolas is Aiden's father?", he asked in disbelief.

"Well, we thought he was. For a long time, even after he was born. And then people kept telling me how much he looked like Lucky, so I got suspicious. It turns out that Helena had the other paternity tests tampered with. Lucky was Aiden's biological father."

"Okay. But what does any of this have to do with how Jake...", Jason trailed off, unable to bring himself to say the word "died." He fought back a new wave of tears that were threatening to fall.

Elizabeth looked down at the floor. "I got the test results in the mail the night that the accident happened. That's why I didn't notice that Jake had gone outside. Until I saw the door open."

She allowed the tears to stream down her face. She closed her eyes in agony as she remembered the events of that night. That open door. Her precious baby lying on the cold pavement. Those moments at the hospital where she was praying for a miracle. Lucky coming into the room and telling her that they didn't get one. How she wanted to die right then and there.

"Elizabeth? What happened next?", Jason pressed gently. He didn't want to know. He really didn't. But he needed answers.

"I saw the door was open", she repeated, taking a shaky breath. "And then, I went outside. And there was Jake. Lying there in the road."

Elizabeth buried her head in her hands. She hated this. She had to live with the loss of her baby every day. His sweet smile. His laughing blue eyes. God, she missed him.

"He...he got hit...by a car", Jason managed, almost choking on every word.

"Yeah", she confirmed, unable to restrain her sobs. Jason felt like he was frozen. He couldn't cry anymore. He was pretty sure that there wasn't one more tear left in him.

"The doctors...they did everything they could. There just wasn't any more they could do. I'm so sorry, Jason."

Jason allowed her to rest her arms around him. He held onto her tightly, so tightly that he was afraid she wouldn't be able to breathe. He didn't know how he was going to be able to get through this. How do you ever get over losing a child? Is it even possible? He wanted to ask her. Would this pain ever go away? Or does it linger every day for the rest of your life, and you just have to find some way to go on?

Finally, he was able to speak. "I want to go see him."

Elizabeth slowly backed away from him, shaking her head. "Jason, that's not..."

"He's my son, Elizabeth", he said, cutting her off. "I never got to say goodbye."

"Okay", she whispered.

* * *

It was a beautiful day. A little cool, but there wasn't a cloud in the sky. It would've been more fitting if it had been rainy and depressing, but no. It was one of the prettiest days Port Charles had seen in weeks. Jason and Elizabeth walked in silence across the graveyard. No parent should ever have to visit their child's grave, and yet here they were. Jason followed Elizabeth step for step, paying little attention to his surroundings. Until she finally stopped.

He took a shaky breath, and forced himself to look down at his son's tombstone.

"Jacob Martin Spencer", he finally uttered, reading the engraving. This just kept getting worse and worse. "Lucky raised him."

"Oh, Jason...", Elizabeth breathed, shaking her head sympathetically.

She wasn't sure what to say. Nothing that she could come up with would possibly make him feel any better. It had taken a long time, but the pain that she felt now was a dull pain. It was always there. It always hurt. But it was one she could live with, that she had to live with. Jason's pain was like someone jabbed a knife in his heart. She knew that because that's how she felt for months after Jake died. It would take him a long time to be able to heal from this.

"He didn't even know me", Jason whispered, unable to tear his eyes from the stone. "I was his father, and he didn't even know me."

"I'm going to go wait in the car, okay?", she finally said, gently touching his shoulder. He just nodded. She took one last regretful look, and walked away. She knew he needed to talk to Jake alone.

Jason reluctantly knelt down on the grass. His eyes glistened with tears that he thought he was all cried-out of. He moved one hand along the surface of the stone, and covered his mouth with the other one. Why couldn't it have been him who died? He would trade his life for Jake to have his back in a heartbeat.

"Hey, Jake", he finally managed to speak. "I love you, buddy. I love you so much."

He leaned his head down, and took a deep breath. "You don't know me. I wish I could tell you that I'm your daddy...but I guess I wasn't. And I don't know why. I don't know how I could've walked away from you."

A moment passed, and Jason continued to stare at the stone. "I'm sorry I wasn't there for you, Jake", he said softly. "I'm so sorry. I don't remember walking away. God help me. I can't remember."

Jason glanced upwards at the sky, wondering if his son's spirit was looking down on him. He prayed that it was. That Jake could somehow hear everything he was saying.

"You had so much ahead of you. You were going to be amazing. Just like your mom. I always knew it. You had the best mom in the world, Jake. I bet you knew that. She loved you so much...so do I. I know that you're in...Heaven now", he sighed, his heart breaking more with each word. "But you shouldn't be. You should be here. With your mom and your brothers...and with me. I thought about you so much. I couldn't wait to get to see you again. And now...I don't know how I'm supposed to deal with this."

Jason glanced back at the car where Elizabeth was looking at him. Then, he sadly took one last look at the tombstone. "I guess what I came here to say is...goodbye. Goodbye, Jake. I love you. I'll always love you. So much."

He touched the surface of the stone one more time, feeling a stray tear run down his cheek. And then he forced himself up off the ground, and staggered back to the car. He almost felt paralyzed. Elizabeth got out of the car, and threw her arms around him.

"I don't know how to do this", he whispered into her hair. "I don't know how to let him go."

She slowly pulled back, and cupped his face in her hands. "I know. It's the hardest thing in the world to do. There were times when I thought it was impossible. There are still times when I dream about him and wake up crying in the middle of the night. There are times when I take the boys in a toy store, and I see a toy motorcycle. And it kills me. The pain never goes away. But you learn to live in spite of it. That's all we can do. That's what Jake would want us to do."

"There's just so much I wish I'd done differently."

"We can't change the past", she said simply. "All we can do is move forward, and learn from it. Jason, I'm so sorry you're having to go through this all over again. But I hope you know that if you ever need to talk or scream or cry, I'll listen. Because I know exactly what you're going through."

Jason looked into her eyes, so full of sincerity and kindness. She was so strong. She raised this child. She made him breakfast every morning. She tucked him in every night. She was there for every significant moment. This was a nightmare for him. But he could only imagine how devastating it had been for her. And yet, she continued to live. But he didn't know if he had that kind of strength.

"You're going to make it through this", Elizabeth vowed. "I promise."

He slowly nodded, and pulled her into his arms. He needed her. She was the only thing that was keeping him remotely sane. He had already lost Jake. He couldn't afford to lose her too.

* * *

**Tough chapter to read I know. But let me know what you think, please.**


	4. Chapter 4

**A/N: So, thank you guys so much for the reviews and favorites. They really mean so much. Honestly, I don't like this chapter quite as much as I liked some of the others. Probably because I had less time to spend on it, thanks to my unbearable amount of schoolwork. However, I hope you guys like it anyway. :)**

* * *

Against her better judgment, Elizabeth continued to harbor Jason at her house for several more days. At least until he was somewhat ready to resume his old life. He wasn't talking much...though that wasn't unusual for him. He didn't eat very much either. She could see that he was still in a lot of pain, and she didn't want to make it worse by forcing him to go back to Sam. Still, she was sure he would remember eventually, and he wouldn't have to be forced.

That particular Saturday morning, she was going about her normal routine. Cook breakfast, wash clothes, etc. Typical mom stuff. The boys were in the next room watching cartoons. She didn't know what Jason was doing. And then she realized that he would, more than likely, come downstairs at any moment forgetting that it was Saturday. She hadn't considered what she would do with him on the weekend when the boys were home.

But before she could get out of the kitchen, she heard Cameron's voice. "Jason?"

She immediately rushed into the room. Her oldest son was staring at Jason like he had seen a ghost. Which, technically, wasn't that far off.

"Hey, buddy", Jason said softly, allowing himself to smile at the child who had grown so much since he had last seen him. This was the first time Jason had smiled in days. He didn't even care that he was supposed to stay hidden anymore.

Poor Cameron just continued to look at him in shock. "But you...mom said...", the kid trailed off, looking in his mother's direction for an explanation.

"Listen, baby. I know it's hard to believe, but it turns out that Jason has actually been alive this whole time", Elizabeth informed her son.

Jason nodded in confirmation of what she was saying. Cameron still didn't seem convinced. Aiden watched the scene in curiousity from the couch, as he didn't have the first clue as to what was going on.

"If you've been alive, then where have you been?", Cameron asked bluntly.

That's when Elizabeth realized that she had yet to ask that question. Where had Jason been all this time? She watched Jason try to mentally formulate a response to that question. God, there was undoubtedly going to be some complicated backstory to this. She just knew it.

"Buddy, that's...complicated", Jason finally replied.

Elizabeth sighed, and rested her hands on her son's shoulders. "It doesn't really matter where he's been anyway. All that matters is that he's alive, right?"

Cam nodded. "I guess. I'm glad you're back, Jason."

Jason gave him a hint of a smile. "Me too."

* * *

They spent the next hour lecturing the boys on how important it was to keep Jason's presence a secret for the time being. Elizabeth had serious doubts that it would work. Kids don't really think before they talk the majority of the time. But she hoped her boys would.

She did notice how Jason's demeanor had changed now that he could be around the kids. He was letting himself smile, even laugh a little bit. Something that he had done none of in the past few days. It was nice to see. She knew he would be in pain for a long time, but letting him spend time with the boys was helping.

It took Cameron almost no time at all to start chatting with Jason, almost like he'd never been gone. Aiden, usually more reserved, followed suit shortly after. He just had this way with kids. She knew he would've been such a good father to Jake.

"Oh, you got a girlfriend, huh?", she could hear Jason remark from his spot on the living room floor. He had been playing games with the boys for several hours at this point.

Elizabeth smiled, and settled herself on the floor next to them. "Well, it's more of an on-and-off again kind of relationship."

"Oh, I see. What's her name?"

"Emma Drake", Cam replied, moving one of his pieces into the Home space. "Ha! Only one more, and I win."

Jason was a bit taken aback. Robin's daughter was already old enough to be having crushes?

"A lot of time has passed", Elizabeth commented, as if she knew what he was thinking. She turned her attention to the game board, where Aiden was rolling the dice. Or attempting to roll the dice.

"Six", she said, giving a sympathetic look to her oldest son. "Sorry, Cam. Looks like Aiden wins."

"Yay!", the little boy yelled excitedly, clapping his hands together.

"Again?", Cameron groaned, prompting a laugh from his mother. "I want a rematch."

"Well, why don't we do teams this time so your mom can play?", Jason suggested, looking at Elizabeth.

"Okay. But I wanna be on your team", Cam smiled up at him.

Jason gave him a slight smile in return. The last few days had been pure hell for him. Not a minute passed by that he didn't think of Jake. That his heart didn't ache for his son. Add the fact that he had been pretty much isolated from the rest of the world. It was nice to be able to be around these kids. Great kids, really. He could see Elizabeth in both of them. In Cameron's smile. In Aiden's eyes. He saw much of her in Jake too.

A couple of nights ago, he and Elizabeth had looked through some old pictures of Jake. It hurt more than he imagined it would to look at them. But Jake looked happy. He guessed that was the one thing he could take away from them. Though he had a wonderful mother, and Jason had no doubt that Elizabeth did everything in her power to make sure her kids were happy. It was just one of the many things he loved about her.

* * *

Later that night, Elizabeth finally got the two hyper children to bed, and walked back downstairs.

"Jason?", she called softly, noticing he wasn't in the room. She searched through the whole bottom half of the house before finally thinking to check the front porch. And sure enough, there he was.

She pulled her thin wrap closer to her body, as the wind was just making it colder than it already was. Jason was just standing there looking out in the distance, absorbed in his thoughts.

Elizabeth waved her hand in front of his face. "Jason? You okay?"

He jumped back a bit, clearly startled by her presence. "Uh, yeah. I'm fine. Maybe a little cold."

"That's what happens when you go outside where there's no heat", she remarked. "And you're not fine. What's going on?"

They stood in silence for a moment before he finally responded. "It's almost Thanksgiving. And after that, it'll be Christmas. And then New Years, Easter..."

Elizabeth sighed, knowing where he was going with this. "All of these holidays and Jake won't be here to celebrate them."

Jason leaned over the railing, his hands gripping it tightly. He felt her hand gently touch his shoulder, but he didn't look up.

"Jason, please look at me", she implored, and his eyes reluctantly met hers in obedience. "It's going to be hard. It's still hard for me. But you'll get through it, I promise. You'll be with your family. They'll help you get through it."

He knew she was referring to Sam. And he was very lucky that Elizabeth still hadn't told her that he was alive. But he didn't want to spend one minute with that woman, much less a holiday with her. He wanted to spend them with Elizabeth. She was the one that he loved, the one that he needed.

"No", he said simply, letting go of the railing.

Elizabeth's sigh reflected her exhaustion. "Jason, you can't keep fighting this. Sooner or later, you have to go back to her. She's your wife."

"Well, even if that's true, there's no way it's going to stay that way."

God, he was so stubborn. He would probably remember everything as soon as he saw Sam again. She had to get him to see that. Because this couldn't keep going on. Especially now that he was spending time with the boys. It would take them no time to get attached to him. She feared the same problem with herself.

"You love her", Elizabeth said quietly, even as Jason shook his head. "You do. You just don't remember. And you love your son. When you see them, you're going to remember everything."

"I don't love her", Jason replied adamantly, growing more frustrated. "I love you!"

His passionate outburst left her stunned. He was still insisting that he loved her. But that was only because he didn't remember! How many times over the past few years did she long to hear him say that? She wanted it to be real though. She needed it to be real. Not the result of some sketchy memory loss. She refused to let herself hope for something that would vanish as soon as his memory returned.

"I know you believe that right now", she said softly. "And maybe you do love me. But Jason, I've seen the way you've looked at Sam for years, okay. You haven't looked at me that way in so long. Well, until now. But it's not real."

Jason sighed. He could certainly understand how she would look at it that way. She wouldn't believe him until he did get all those memories back. Even the ones he didn't want.

There was a brief silence before he spoke. "I'll tell Sam and everybody else that I'm alive."

Elizabeth couldn't contain her surprise. Just like that? Though she wasn't entirely sure what she expected him to do. Maybe she just expected him to fight her a little harder on it. Or hoped he would. She immediately felt guilty for that. He was doing the right thing, and she knew it.

"That's good", she uttered, glancing down at the ground for a moment.

"Under one condition."

She looked up again. "What?"

He moved a bit closer to her. "That I get to spend Thanksgiving here...with you."

Well, Thanksgiving was only a few days away. Truthfully, Elizabeth just didn't get excited about holidays the way she used to. She tried to for the boys' sakes. But ever since she lost Jake, every one had just been so difficult. And even before then, there just always seemed to be something missing. She always knew what it was.

"Okay", she agreed. "You can spend Thanksgiving with us."

"Thank you", Jason breathed, wrapping her in his arms. She allowed herself to smile as she held onto him. And it was kind of strange. She wasn't the least bit cold anymore.

* * *

**So, I know you guys are dying to find out where Jason has been and what happened to him. That will come out eventually, don't worry. But in the meantime, let me know what you think!**


	5. Chapter 5

**A/N: Hey, guys! Wow, thank you so much for all the awesome feedback. It really helps me so much, and totally keeps me inspired. I'm glad you guys are liking it. So, this is the Thanksgiving chapter. I thought about putting another chapter before this one, but I thought it would be cool if I just went ahead with this one since Thanksgiving is actually this week. This chapter is really just a lot of fluff. All the drama is going to start in the next one. Hope you enjoy!**

* * *

Thanksgiving had arrived and Elizabeth found herself torn on how to approach the holiday. She was excited about being able to spend it with Jason and the boys. But a part of her dreaded it as well. Because she knew that after it was over, Jason would reveal himself to the rest of the town. His memories would probably come back. She would lose him all over again. And knowing that just made her all the more determined to make this Thanksgiving the best one ever.

After shopping for the last of the groceries that she would need, she walked in the front door to see Cameron and Jason playing video games. Aiden, not old enough to know how to play video games, was sitting between them cheering. Elizabeth smiled, and cleared her throat to make them aware of her presence.

They all turned around in response. "Hey", Jason said softly. "We didn't hear you come in."

"Uh-huh. You were too absorbed in Madden", she said playfully, setting the bags down on the table as they all approached her.

"I beat Jason twice", Cameron said proudly. He was loving that he had someone to play video games with now. He had tried to teach Aiden how to play a few times, but his younger brother was never any competition. In fact, he usually just pushed random buttons. And his mom...well, she just didn't like them.

Elizabeth smiled, knowing Jason probably let Cam win. "To think I missed your epic games", she sighed. "You guys will have to play again where I can watch."

"Okay!", Cameron agreed excitedly.

"Ooohh. Pie!", Aiden said happily as he looked in one of the bags.

"Oh no, mister", Elizabeth said quickly, picking the bag up out of the child's reach. "We don't get pie until tonight. We will not have a repeat of last year."

"What happened last year?", Jason asked curiously.

"These two decided to have a pie fight in the kitchen", she informed him, looking at the boys with a stern look. "They had it _everywhere_."

The boys looked down at the floor, unable to hide their smiles. Jason couldn't help but smile too. And eventually, Elizabeth gave in and smiled as well. It wasn't amusing at the time, but it was a nice memory when she looked back. She wanted to have more nice memories, and she hoped more would be made this year.

* * *

"Jason Morgan, the five-star chef", Elizabeth remarked in a playful manner as she watched Jason check the oven for the fifteenth time in about as many minutes.

"Well, this stuff isn't easy", he replied, wiping his hands on a paper towel. "How do you do this every year?"

"I'm a mom", she shrugged with a smile. "I have to be able to do this stuff. And I mess up at least one thing a year. The boys just don't notice."

He gave her a slight smile. "You're pretty incredible. You know that?"

She felt herself blush a bit at the compliment. "Not really. I don't see how I'm that much different from any other woman."

"You definitely are", Jason said softly. And that was most definitely the truth. Her beauty was striking, even now. Her hair was swept up in a messy bun, and she had spilt flour on herself half an hour ago. But she still looked amazing in his eyes.

Elizabeth smiled before the faint noise from the radio attracted her attention. "Oh, I love this song." She turned it up a bit.

"Country, huh?", Jason commented.

"Yeah, I know. I've just always liked this song."

He watched her hum thoughtlessly to the soft melody as she pulled a gallon of milk out of the refrigerator. God, he loved everything about this woman. Now, he could add the way she moves to an old country song to that already long list.

He held out his hand to her. "Dance with me."

She turned away from the mixing bowl, a bit of surprise in her eyes. "You want to dance?", she asked with a hint of disbelief in her voice.

Jason nodded. "I want to dance."

Elizabeth slowly placed her hand in his, and he led her to the open part of the kitchen. She wrapped her arms around his neck, and they began to sway to the music.

_All day long I can hear people talking out loud_

_But when you hold me near, you drown out the crowd_

_Old Mr. Webster could never define_

_What's being said between your heart and mine_

Elizabeth closed her eyes, feeling Jason's heart beating so close to her own. She couldn't deny how it made her feel. Happy. Alive. God, why did he have to make her feel this way? She was only going to get hurt in the end. And yet, she could never seem to protect her heart where he was concerned.

_The smile on your face lets me know that you need me_

_There's a truth in your eyes saying you'd never leave me_

_The touch of your hand says you'll catch me whenever I fall_

_Yeah, you say it best _

_When you say nothing at all_

He held her tightly in his arms as the song played. Having her in his arms...it felt so right. It felt too right to possibly be wrong. He didn't want to be away from her ever again. He didn't care that he supposedly had a whole different life with someone else. This was the woman that he wanted to be with. Elizabeth.

"Oooohhhh!", two mingling voices interrupted, completely shattering both of their thoughts. Elizabeth and Jason hurriedly let go of each other as Cameron and Aiden grinned at the two of them.

"Mom and Jason sitting in a tree, K-I-S-S-I-N-G", Cam sung playfully.

Elizabeth could feel her cheeks heating up. Jason, on the other hand, seemed to be rather amused. Even smiling a bit. And when he smiled, she couldn't help but smile too.

* * *

"Okay, who's ready for dinner?", Elizabeth called. Before she could even turn around, they were all seated at the dining room table. She chuckled to herself.

Most of the food was already resting on plates or in bowls that were on the surface of the table. Turkey, stuffing, pumpkin pie...it looked delicious if she did say so herself. And judging by how much everyone ate, she would say it tasted pretty good too. She gave a smile of satisfaction.

Everyone was working on dessert when Cameron spoke up. "Hey, we haven't done the game yet."

"What game?", Jason wondered, taking another bite of pumpkin pie.

"It's kind of a Thanksgiving tradition. We go around the table and each say something that we're thankful for", Elizabeth explained.

"Can I go first, mommy?", Aiden asked hopefully.

"Sure. Go ahead, baby", she replied before lifting her glass of water to her lips.

The little boy thought about it for a minute, before finally coming up with something. "I'm thankful that we have Jason now cause he makes mommy smile a lot. And I like it when mommy smiles."

Elizabeth would have been embarrassed by that response if it hadn't been so darn true. Having Jason here had been challenging. It had brought up a lot of things that she didn't care to remember. But it had also made her happy. Because God help her. She still loved him. Maybe even her kids could see that. She glanced at him across the table, and was slightly surprised to see his eyes shining with tears that he would relentlessly fight back.

"Uh...Cam. Your turn", she said, knowing that the topic needed to be changed soon.

"I'm thankful for Jason because he plays games with me and I can talk to him about stuff that mom doesn't understand."

She sighed to herself. It really was going to hurt the boys when Jason left. He had spent a lot of time with them in the past few days, and he was so great with them. But they were obviously growing a lot more attached to him than she realized. She _dated _Ewen and A.J., and the boys didn't get this attached to them. And now Jason was going to feel guilty leaving.

"Mom?", Cameron prompted, interrupting her thoughts. "It's your turn."

She smiled a bit. "Right. Well, I'm thankful for my beautiful babies, and...I'm thankful that I have a really great friend back in my life."

Jason knew he was next. And he had never been one to vocalize his feelings. Not in the least. He was very surprised to see the impact his being here had made on all of them. He thought he was the one that was lucky to get to be there, where he really wanted to be. He loved being with Elizabeth and the kids. They made _him_ smile. Something he didn't think was possible just a few days ago.

True to his nature, Jason decided to keep his turn short and sweet.

"I'm thankful to be back home."

* * *

**So, I really just wanted a chapter that wasn't depressing before more heavy stuff hits. I feel like holidays should be happy :)**

**Anyway, let me know what you think! And Happy Thanksgiving, everyone!**


	6. Chapter 6

**A/N: Hope you all had a happy Thanksgiving! I told myself that I would get caught up on schoolwork over the break but...yeah, not so much. So, it may be a little longer than usual before I get another chance to update. But hopefully, I'll be able to soon. Anyway, thank you guys so much for the awesome reviews, and here is the next chapter!**

* * *

_He could see her face. She was so real, so perfect. She looked like an angel. That was fitting. She was an angel as far as he was concerned. She was right there in front of him. But when he reached out his hand to touch her...she was gone._

_"Elizabeth?", he uttered in confusion. But there was no sign of her anywhere._

_Suddenly, his eyes opened. He was breathing heavily, and he began to panic as his eyes darted around the room. It was cold. Dark. Isolated. Barren gray walls were enclosed around him. He was confused, and almost certain that he was still dreaming. This was a part of his nightmare just like Elizabeth disappearing. And then he saw the bars._

_Oh God, he was in a prison cell. This was a dream. It had to be. Slowly, he forced himself off of the cold cement, and staggered to the bars. His hands shook as he grabbed a hold of them. There wasn't a soul in sight. This was no ordinary prison._

_"No. Please no", he whispered to himself. He couldn't be locked in a cage somewhere. He had to get back to his family. They needed him! _

_"Help!", he yelled at the top of his lungs, desperately hoping for someone to hear him. A few minutes passed. Nothing. He leaned his head against the bars. He didn't know how long he had been in here. What he had done to get put in here. And he hadn't the faintest idea where "here" was. _

_Suddenly, he heard the noise of footsteps. They grew louder and louder. And finally, he looked up. And there was a face looking back at him..._

Jason's eyes opened in a startling fashion. He glanced around Elizabeth's guest room, coming to the conclusion that it was just a dream. Or a nightmare, really. He wasn't back in that place. He was back home. Thank God.

After collecting himself, he made his way downstairs. He considered telling Elizabeth that he was sick or something. Anything to delay him having to reveal himself to the whole town. He didn't really have a desire to see any of them. At least not if it meant that he couldn't stay with Elizabeth and the boys. This was where he wanted to be.

"Good morning", Elizabeth said, forcing a smile as he walked into the room. She noted the look of pure dread on his face. Honestly, she was dreading this day just as much. But she couldn't let him know that.

Jason didn't speak. He only pulled her into an embrace. She didn't pull away. She didn't want to lose him all over again. There was the selfish part of her that didn't want him to remember Sam. And she felt awful about that.

"I don't want to go", he whispered into her hair. "I don't want to lose you again."

God, this was killing her. Why did life have to be so unfair to her? Elizabeth would be the first to admit that she had made many stupid choices in her life. But she had to have made up for them by now. All she wanted was to be happy. And yet, that goal now seemed more out of reach than ever.

"You're not going to lose me", she said softly, slowly drawing away from him. "I don't see any reason why we can't be..."

"Friends?", Jason offered, finishing her sentence.

Elizabeth nodded. "I think once you remember everything, you'll agree that it would be the best thing."

He let out a deep sigh. He didn't want to make this any harder on her than it already was. She had been so understanding, so kind to him. Even after all of the things that he had apparently done. She hadn't told anyone about him. But that had been under the condition that he tell everyone himself. And now, the time had come.

"I gave you my word that I would tell everyone that I'm alive after Thanksgiving. And I'm prepared to do that. But what I'm not prepared to do is give up on us. I can't do that."

She gave him a sad smile. "You'll feel differently when you see Sam again. She's your wife, Jason. She's the one you didn't give up on. Not me."

Jason knew that he would never win this argument. For her to ever believe that she was the one he wanted to be with, he would have to remember his life with Sam. And he would still have to choose Elizabeth. That was the only way he even stood a chance of getting her back.

A moment of silence passed before Jason decided to change the subject. "Are the boys awake yet?"

"Yeah", Elizabeth replied, taking note of the topic change. "They're playing in Cameron's room. If you wanted to say goodbye to them or anything."

"I don't want to say goodbye to them", he said quietly, noticing a hint of disappointment in her eyes. He took her hands into his own. "Because I don't want to leave. I know I have to let these other people back into my life. I understand that. But this is where I want to be. You're not ready to believe that yet, and that's okay. I'll wait as long as you need me to."

"Jason...", she sighed in frustration. Why couldn't he just make this easy on her?

"I'll tell the boys what's going on", he went on. "But I'm not going to say goodbye to them. And I'm not going to say goodbye to you either."

* * *

"You're leaving?", Cameron uttered, a hint of disappointment evident in his voice. Frankly, the kid wasn't all that surprised. This had happened before with his dad. But somehow, he thought that Jason would be around for a little while. At least, he had hoped so.

"Maybe. I'm not really sure how everything's going to play out just yet, buddy", Jason admitted. "But I can promise you that I'm going to come see you and your mom and your brother a lot. I just don't know if I'll be living here."

Elizabeth hated seeing the sad look in her son's eyes. He had been through this type of thing far too often. And Cam was such a great kid. She shouldn't have let him get attached to Jason, knowing that it would only be temporary. And while she hoped that Jason would be around to visit, she wouldn't get her hopes up. Maybe he would for a little while. Until he got sucked back into the problems of everyone else in town. That was probably his biggest fault. He was _too_ loyal to people who didn't deserve it.

"How come you have to go?", Aiden asked, looking up at Jason with a disappointed look similar to his brother's.

Jason looked helplessly at Elizabeth. These kids were breaking his heart. He wanted to assure them that he wasn't going anywhere. But he wasn't sure what she wanted him to say.

Elizabeth pulled her youngest child onto her lap, and put her arm around her older one. "Boys, Jason has a lot of people that really love him", she said gently. "And they miss him very much. So, he needs to spend time with them too, right?"

Both boys reluctantly nodded.

"But that doesn't mean that I don't care about you guys or your mom", Jason said quickly. "I care about all of you very much."

Elizabeth fought back the tears that were threatening to fall. She knew he cared about them. But that didn't change the fact that she and the boys would end up getting hurt if she didn't let Jason go now. It was something that she had to do.

She walked Jason out to the front porch, neither of them saying much. Everything had already been said.

"I hate this", he finally said quietly.

"So do I", Elizabeth admitted. "But it has to be done. Things have to be made right again."

"The boys hate me now."

"They don't hate you", she sighed. "They were just starting to get used to having you around. I was too. But you don't have to worry about us. We'll be okay. You need to go focus on your family."

He took her into his arms, wishing that he didn't have to let go. "You're not going to get rid of me. I'm going to come back to you and the boys."

"We'll see", she replied, pulling back from him. "Take care, Jason."

"You too", Jason said softly, unable to hide the sadness in his voice. He locked eyes with her one more time, and then turned to walk away.

* * *

He didn't know where to go first. There were so many people that he needed to go see. He finally decided to get the worst out of the way from the get-go. So, with a feeling of dread building up inside him, he made his way to his old penthouse.

He took a deep breath as his hand traveled to the door, but he couldn't bring himself to knock on it. He didn't want to see Sam. Frankly, he could care less if she knew he was alive or not. He didn't want to be involved with her at all, much less be married to her.

He could hear Elizabeth's advice echoing in his head. _"Don't shut her out, Jason. She's your wife."_

Maybe she had a point. He didn't love this woman, but he had married her for some reason. He supposed that she did have a right to know that he was still alive.

But on the other hand...if Sam was anything like he remembered, he would never get rid of her once she found out.

"Just do it", he whispered to himself. "Just get it over with."

Jason took a deep breath, and rapped on the door. A few seconds passed, and there was no answer. He began to feel a bit relieved. Maybe Sam was out, and he could avoid her for a little while longer. But as he turned to leave, the door opened. He stood frozen in place, his back to the door.

"Uh, can I help you?", he heard a voice ask. He instantly recognized it as hers. He had no choice now. Slowly, he turned to face her.

"J-J-Jason?", she stammered in pure shock. And then, she collapsed onto the floor.

* * *

**And so the drama begins. And as always, reviews are much appreciated :)**


	7. Chapter 7

**A/N: Thank you guys for all the feedback! I really appreciate it! So, I've been as stressed as I expected, but I didn't want to leave you guys waiting for too long. Therefore, I made time to get the new chapter up!**

* * *

As Sam lay motionless on the floor, Jason sighed and closed the door behind him. He bent down to check her pulse, just to be sure that she hadn't stopped breathing or anything. She hadn't. He gazed around the room. It looked very similar to how he remembered it. His eye caught a hold of a photo sitting on the middle of the mantle. Him, Sam, and a baby. The son that he didn't remember having. This had been his life? It all seemed so wrong.

After a few moments, Sam's eyes fluttered open again. And he was the first thing that came into her view. Her eyes grew large, probably not believing what she was seeing. She forced herself up off of the floor, and so he stood up as well.

"Who are you?", she demanded.

Was she serious right now? Wasn't it obvious who he was? Then again, she may have been a little disoriented from the fainting spell.

"It's me. Jason", he uttered.

He wasn't sure what he was expecting her reaction to be. Disbelief? Happiness? Confusion? However, he certainly wasn't expecting what happened next.

And that would be the sting of her hand colliding against his cheek. The sheer unexpectedness of the slap almost knocked him to the ground. What the hell was wrong with this woman? Who greets their "dead" spouse by assaulting them?

"Now, let's try this again. Who are you?", she demanded again, apparently refusing to believe that he was who he said he was.

"I'm Jason Morgan", he said again, this time in an obviously annoyed tone. But this time, he caught her hand before she could deliver another slap.

"What kind of mind game are you playing with me?", Sam asked stubbornly. "My husband is dead. And for you to come in here and try to tell me that you are him..."

"I am him! Unfortunately", Jason said, muttering the last part under his breath as he let go of her wrist.

"How in the hell do you expect me to believe that? Do you have any idea how many times I have hoped and prayed that my husband is alive? But he's not. Jason is gone. Let me guess. You're going to end up being his long-lost twin, right? Since apparently, Franco isn't."

"What are you even talking about?", he asked in frustration. God, Sam was even crazier than he remembered.

"Oh, like you don't know", Sam retorted. "I'm sure you know every single detail of Jason's life. You would have to if you wanted to pretend to be him. And for what? To get to me, somehow? Like I haven't been through enough already?"

Jason was ready to get far away from her at this point. He had told her he was alive. It wasn't his fault if she didn't believe him.

"Okay. Well, I told you what I came here to tell you. Goodbye, Sam."

Unfortunately for him, Sam appeared to have a change of heart before he could get out the door.

"Wait."

* * *

Elizabeth was checking some files at the nurses' station when she was approached by Patrick. "God, I'm ready for this day to be over."

She smiled sympathetically. "Yeah, it's been a busy day." She knew that his work schedule probably had very little to do with his stress though. It, more than likely, had to do with his "dead" wife who was actually not dead. Robin had recently resurfaced, and that was wonderful. Except not so much for Sabrina, who was about to marry him when this happened.

"Can I ask you something?", Patrick wondered.

She nodded. "What is it?"

"What do you do if you're in love with two people at the same time?"

His voice sounded desperate, like he would take any advice that he could get. However, she wasn't sure that she was the best person to be asking. Every time she found herself in that situation, things ended badly. Very badly.

"You know, I'm not sure if I ever figured that one out", she admitted. "I guess I would say to just follow your heart. No matter where it leads."

Patrick nodded. "That's good advice. And it would probably work if I wasn't so damn confused right now."

"Well, you're in a very tough situation. You and Robin were happily married, and then you thought you lost her. And then, you fell in love with Sabrina. So no matter what you decide, you didn't do anything wrong here."

"Thank you, Elizabeth", he said with a hint of a smile, before turning to walk away.

"Hey, Patrick?", she said softly. "Can I ask you something too?"

"Sure."

She looked around to see if there was anyone listening, and then turned back to him. "What would you suggest to someone who's in love with her ex who's married, but doesn't remember or want to be with his wife?"

Patrick sighed. "You and Jason, huh?"

Elizabeth reluctantly nodded. "I know it's stupid of me. He'll remember Sam eventually, and I know that. But right now...he loves me. I don't want to get hurt again. But I'm not sure that I don't feel the same way about him."

He thought about it for a second before speaking. "You know you could make a list. Weigh the pros and cons of getting involved with Jason."

She smiled a bit. "Not a bad idea. Thank you, Patrick."

It was a good idea. Mostly because she was sure that the cons would heavily outweigh the pros. It wasn't practical. She would make this list, and then, she would see that for herself. Maybe then, she would be able to let the idea of her and Jason die. For good.

* * *

So, as it turns out, Sam was capable of listening after all. Jason explained everything to her. Well, not everything. There was a whole lot that he didn't even know himself. And he most definitely left out the part about Elizabeth harboring him from the whole town when he came back. So, in all actuality, he really told her very little. He watched, with a mix of satisfaction and utter dread, as her denial turned into joy.

"I can't believe this", she breathed, allowing herself to smile.

Neither could he. And yet, this was the situation he was now in. He was her husband, which was the last role in the world that he wanted.

He fought back the urge to pull away when she kissed him. But all he could think the entire time was how much he wished that she was Elizabeth. _She_ was the woman that he wanted. But what in the world did she want? She was the one who made him go back to Sam! Who made him promise to try with her! And yet, he couldn't help but hope that Elizabeth still loved him.

Sam pulled back, and brushed his cheek with her fingers. "You're real. I can't believe you're real."

"Yeah", he uttered, standing up from his seat on the couch. He couldn't take this anymore. Every touch from her just made him want to go running in the opposite direction. How could this have ever been right?

But of course, she followed him across the room. "I just can't believe you're really home. I thought I would never see you again. Oh my God, Jason. I had so many dreams about you, and then I would wake up only to realize that they would never be real. But they can be now."

Jason sighed, realizing that he probably should have been better prepared for this before he came. He didn't want to be with Sam. But he knew that Elizabeth would probably kill him if he told Sam what he really thought about her, even though she had even more reason to hate the brunette. So, he decided to take a middle-ground approach.

"Listen, I know it must've been hard for you when you thought I was dead..."

"You have no idea", Sam said, cutting him off. "I held out hope for such a long time. And every day that passed by, I wondered if I would be able to get through it. And then, Danny got sick and...oh my God. You didn't know. Danny's your son. Heather messed with the tests, Jason. He's yours."

Well, yeah. Elizabeth had told him that he had a son. She hadn't told him that there was a possibility that he wasn't the father at first. He thought about asking her to elaborate, but then decided it was irrelevant anyway.

"Jason, are you okay?", Sam asked, wondering why she wasn't getting the reaction that she expected. "You don't seem happy or surprised or...you probably want to see him, huh? Hang on. I'll be right back."

He watched her disappear up the stairs, and whipped out his new cell phone. Turns out that phones had gotten a lot more advanced since he'd been gone. He still wasn't entirely sure how to work this one. Finally, he got it to call Elizabeth.

_"Jason?"_, he heard her say after a couple of rings. _"Have you seen anyone yet?"_

"Just Sam. I don't know how I'm going to do this, Elizabeth", he complained under his breath. "She's crazy!"

_"Jason, I'm sure you're overreacti-"_

"She slapped me! And then, just a few minutes later, she's acting like some lovesick schoolgirl! Please come help me!"

_"Okay, first of all, I can't leave work right now. Second of all, you have to give her a break. She just found out that you were alive. Do you remember what I did? I stood there and argued with you, thinking that you were a ghost!"_

"I preferred that", he sighed, hearing the dreaded noise of footsteps. "She's coming back. I got to go."

_"Good luck."_

"I'll need it", he said as he hung up the phone.

Sam smiled as she walked over to him with the baby in her arms. And all Jason could think was how sorry he felt for that child. He had to deal with her on an everyday basis.

On first glance, the little boy looked similar to him. Light hair, blue eyes. But the more he looked, he really didn't see all that much of a resemblance. He didn't think the child looked very much like Sam either. But maybe it was just wishful thinking that he didn't actually have a child with her.

"Hey Danny, you want to meet your daddy?", Sam grinned as she looked from the baby to Jason. "Do you want to hold him?"

Jason reluctantly took the little boy from her, and smiled softly at him. "Hey there, buddy. It's nice to meet you."

"You've met him before", Sam casually pointed out.

"That's the thing, Sam. If I did, I don't remember."

Her expression slowly turned to one of confusion. "What are you talking about?"

He sighed, deciding he might as well tell her. "Something happened to my memory. I don't remember having Danny. I don't remember marrying you. And honestly, I don't remember even wanting to be with you."

He quickly realized from the look on her face that those might not have been the best choice of words.

* * *

Elizabeth sat at a corner table at Kelly's on her lunch break with a half-eaten sandwich and a piece of paper in front of her. She had decided to take Patrick's advice, and make a list of the pros and cons of getting involved with Jason again. And just as she expected, the cons far outweighed the pros. But in her opinion, it seemed pretty even. She fiddled with her pencil as she looked down at the two lists.

Cons:

1. He's married.

2. He might only want to be with me because he doesn't remember loving Sam.

3. Do I really want to deal with Sam for the next 16-17 years?

4. What if he gets involved with the mob again?

5. Carly. (speaks for itself)

6. I don't know if I'll ever come first with him.

7. I really don't want to be hurt again, and he always seems to hurt me.

8. I don't want my boys to be hurt again.

9. I hate the way he puts himself in danger for people who aren't worth it.

10. Every relationship I have is doomed to fail.

Pros:

1. He makes me feel safe.

2. My boys need a man in their lives, and they are already attached to him.

3. He is loyal to those he cares about, even if I don't always like it.

4. He has a heart of gold.

5. His eyes. (speak for themselves)

6, 7, 8, 9, 10...I'm completely and totally in love with him.

* * *

**Sooo, please let me know what you think :)**


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